For a moment it looked as if Aiden Starr was going to answer the door with her dress all hiked up like that, and I wondered how virginal Jessie Andrews would get any cleaning done.
I was visiting the set of Adam & Eve’s “Show Me How,” a tender document about older women fucking younger ones. Starr, who is five-feet-nothing, was a last-minute replacement of an equally beloved and much taller performer, for whom the script was written.
“I’m supposed to say ‘You’re so little!’?” Starr says, reading from her script. “It’s going to sound extra pervy if I’m looking up at her” (she changes it to an even-pervier “Your boobies have just grown in”).
We’re in a big house in Calabasas — Spanish for “pumpkins,” but there are only clean rugs, an empty tennis court, a panoramic view of a hillside that could erupt in flame at any moment, and a sense that no one lives here. I don’t live in a house like this. If I did, it would be filthy. This seems beautiful, but sterile. I am neither of those things, either.
Today’s scene, directed by the ever-dependable Andre Madness, calls for bored housewife Starr to seduce ingenue Andrews, whose father knows Starr’s husband who has hired her to clean the house. Get it? Andrews does very little cleaning before Starr puts the moves on her.
“I have something else for you to do,” Starr tells Andrews. “Me.” (She also says she has lots of money, which helps.)
Everybody in the whole damn building has been in porn for years. Madness has his own company but also directs for Wicked as well as Adam & Eve; Starr, who started as a dominatrix called Lolita (and changed her name fairly quickly) in New York and shot her first scene in 2002, was still appearing in “Barely Legal” movies two years ago because of her tininess; production manager Mo Reese shoots POV blowjob movies on the side (he took over the “Asian Mouth Club” series after the great David Aaron Clark died — David Aaron Clark, whose ashes Starr keeps in her apartment); and Andrews herself, who at 21 has been in nearly 200 movies, including “Portrait Of A Call Girl,” an epic Elegant Angel film by Graham Travis which swept the award shows in 2012.
Today will not be the most memorable thing any of them has ever done, but it always amazes me how fast efficient crews like this work, how much they get done, how amiable everyone is, and how little bullshit happens while they put together a little movie that might sell 3,000 copies.
Everything from the efficient makeup lady (who runs a salon in Glendale, 30 miles away), to the guy who shoots stills (and restores muscle cars on the side), to the production assistant who unloaded both muffins and automobiles with equal speed and congeniality were testament to how this can be a good gig if you’re adaptable, friendly, and you know what you’re doing.
Starr’s high heels are giving her grief and the pencil dress she’s wearing keeps riding up, which is why she lingers with her panties showing before Andrews knocks on the door. Madness gets several takes quickly: master shot, reaction shots, a few different angles of Andrews walking in. He corrects for the sun, gives directions to the guy swinging the boom mic, and Andrews checks for its position very casually as she steps into her place. Unlike when she was telling me about being a DJ earlier, her character voice is pitched a half octave higher.
“I’m 19,” she says for some reason.
A man named Eddie is there from the company Blue City. They shoot interactive content for a company called VStroker, which makes a Fleshlight attachment that allows wearers to interact with movies. Eddie has permission from Adam & Eve to get Andrews and Starr to step away from their girl/girl scene to offer several prompts and scenarios to a virtual third partner. Perhaps it will be you. Blue City already has a contract with Hustler, and today is Eddie’s first day with Adam & Eve. Both he and the P.A. are wearing Yankees caps. Tonight, the Red Sox will win their ALDS. I say nothing.
“The interactivity and the hardware component make the VStroker future-proof and piracy-proof,” Eddie is saying. It sounds really cool, both for men with more patience than me and for men without feeling in their hands.
For one of the interactive elements Madness has procured a Fucking Machine, a dildo on a piston. It’s a girl/girl scene, and no one remembered to bring condoms for the dildo. This is the new world we live in.
“Does anyone have a condom?” Madness asks. How cool would it have been if I’d gone to my glove compartment and triumphantly pulled one out? I would have put to rest once and for all the cruel assumption that people who write about porn don’t have sex. But Nope.
Starr is a model of restraint. After every take she lets out a gleeful and predatory “HAW HAW HAW,” which would have never played on film but it’s the way she’s feeling. She and Andrews run lines on a spotless couch, Andrews drapes her hair over the back of it.
Later, after each has shot a cuple dozen individual stills, they get together. Starr stands on an apple box in her high heels to approach the height of the 5’8″ Andrews.
“Really,” Starr says. “Get a picture of this.”
It’s a good day. I eat a lot of crackers and cheese, and drink some ginger ale. I leave before the sex happens, but I am confident that it will, and that it will be professional.
“Show Me How” will be released fairly soon, you can bet.
See also: Adam & Eve
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