Alliteration Alert: “Teeny Tiny Thai Twigs 2”

You don’t even have to watch this movie to appreciate its clever—if misleading—title. What I’m saying to you very directly is that you don’t have to watch this movie.


Still, it’s important to remember that there is very little to distinguish one porn title from another, and one porn performer from another, when you get right down to it.

Hey look: I love porn stars, and porn directors, and porn companies, count many of them as friends, and am fiercely proud of most of them. But the litmus test is this: Would you go to a summer barbecue with a porn movie and hand it to the host, saying, “Hey, this was pretty good; you should watch it”?

Q. But Grams, I don’t go to those kinds of barbecues. In fact, here in Nashua, we call them cookouts.

Fine. Then would you go to some Skyrim convention, Meltdown Comics, or informal get-together at DeVry clutching any AVN Award-winner saying, “This made my 3-minute jerkoff more pleasant than other 3-minute jerkoffs, Jerkoffs”?

No, but you would most certainly go to a bachelor party with a bag of Third World Media titles like this one or the Asian BBW-themed “Japanese Whale Hunt” and show what an ironic hipster you are. Because if you showed up with some matte-covered Wicked movie people would think, “Is this overwrought shit the reason he doesn’t have a girlfriend?”

What I’m saying is that something ineffable distinguishes one porn movie from another, and —Who Knows?—maybe it has something to do with alliteration.

But “Teeny Tiny Thai Twigs 2” here

Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Of course your name is Pai; “Floppy Cocks”—a brave movie; In Thailand, Twister is taken seriously
See also: Third World Media

About Gram the Man 4399 Articles
Gram Ponante is America's Beloved Porn Journalist

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