Anatomy of an Oil Orgy

Kristina rose, 2009, by Gram Ponante

We’ve been cooped up a little while, you and I. And, while we figure out our future together, why don’t you join me for a moment in our high-viscosity past? May of 2009, in Encino, to be exact. If you’re like me, you have no idea what you were doing in May of this year, so please travel back with me for a vivid depiction of a #blessed and #pungetastic #pre-hashtag event.

(Originally published: May 29, 2009)

Like the powerful-thighed, oilslicked women sliding this way and that in an Encino ranch house Tuesday, my thoughts about Third Degree Films’ “Big Butt Oil Orgy” (working title) are all over the place.

“Do you often work in oil?” I asked director Danny Case, also known as Pat Myne.

“As often as I can,” he said.

This house holds many pleasant memories for me. Jenny Hendrix made me a drink here. I watched Amber Rayne fist herself here. And today I would see how ordinary purchases from Target and Wal-Mart could be utilized for something glorious.

First: other than having them bounce up and down on trampolines, is there any other way to present women at their best than by slathering them with baby oil?

Then: What happens when you get seven of them to do it simultaneously?

As is often the good problem to have when I visit porn sets with a large cast, there are a lot of stories to tell. In coming weeks I will share Phoenix Marie’s love of motorcycles, Sophie Dee’s status as the only Welsh person in Los Angeles, Kristina Rose’s favorite masturbation fantasy, and Ava Rose’s inability to be her own biggest fan – therefore I must do it.

In the meantime, here are some facts:

  • Number of bottles of baby oil: 26 (“I just love going to Target and buying 26 bottles of baby oil,” the production manager said)
  • How I would describe the smell of the room once all the oiled women had been fucking in it for an hour: pungetastic
  • Best tans: Phoenix Marie and Lisa Ann

As you will see by the gallery, my photographs begin to lose any sense of composition once the oil starts heating up. But I don’t think you’ll mind.

Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Who-ray came first?; The Buttoned-down Ava Rose; XRCO from the outside in
See also: Third Degree Films

About Gram the Man 4399 Articles
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