This tableau from “Asian Muff Divers” reminds me of ancient photographs in which the subjects strike grave, unsmiling poses, knowing that it takes a long time for the film to expose and that photographs are hard to come by, so they’d better not do anything silly. Though “Twister” was introduced to America in 1966 by [...]

I like this picture a lot. It says so much about priorities. Here are Tara Lynn Foxx and Nina Hartley in Private’s forthcoming movie about “Cheating Hollywood Wives,” directed by Dave Naz. Private, based in Barcelona, rarely shoots in the United States, so the European take on “Cheating Hollywood Wives,” as directed by an American, [...]

Where I come from (GPS coordinates: 30.4813°N 89.7690°W), if you call someone thick, you are calling her retarded. And while having sex with the mentally disabled is arguably the subject matter of 90 percent of JM Video’s titles, it is that other meaning of “thick,” the one involving childbearing hips and breasts that dangle and [...]

Jo shares a trait with porn stars Janine Lindemulder and Meggan Mallone: she has to clamp a hand to her head to keep all the raw sexuality in.

Muffia.com’s parody “Star Trix” (see the review here) features Jayden Jaymes’ uncanny interpretation of the delicious California avocado. Porn Valley-adjacent Fallbrook, California is known as the Avocado Capital of the World, and you can see that the capital of Jayden Jaymes is the only part of her that is not painted green, lest Jack Lawrence, [...]

If there actually were a Boobsville, say in one of California’s many lovely unincorporated areas – along faultlines, devoid of city services, where people eat chips all day – would local officials give visiting dignitaries a Key to the Titty? GET IT??! A key to the ~ ? I should write for Playboy’s Unabashed Dictionary. [...]

This woman’s name is Sai. She is from Thailand and is one of the stars of “Who’s Your Mamasan 2,” a southeast Asian MILF movie. While Sai has good teeth and appears well-fed, it is apparent from the pink shreds of her former dress that this proud woman has been forced to walk the earth [...]

19-year-old Chloe Kez. a nanny and housecleaner from Baltimore, applied to Vivid’s “Brand New Faces” outreach program and shot her first porn scene for the company in “Brand New Faces 17.” Kez seemed surprised when director B. Skow suggested that one of her charges – a 16-year-old boy – might have a motive other than [...]

In “A Tree Grows in Brooklyn,” a Depression-era working class mother of two brews more coffee than she needs, because the act of wasting something makes her feel rich. In Digital Playground’s “Stoya: Scream,” Evan Stone jerks off on a perfectly good piece of steak and Stoya, who in real life is a vegetarian, licks [...]

Because I am on a number of mailing lists, today I received the following announcement about a long-awaited sequel. No Cover Productions has done it again with More Bare Ass-Busting Cum Pigs. These guys are ready to get down and dirty in this hot film, continuing from the explosive action that made its predecessor so [...]

Australia’s Abby Winters Pornographic Concern again presents a vaguely-titled study in corn-(or whatever grains they eat over there)fed women masturbating while bird sound effects co-mingle with their sploshing and grunting: “Intimate Moods.” As you know, I’m into beaks, so naturally I tore into this DVD when I saw the duck on the cover. Needless to [...]

Today we’ll talk about assonance, the use of similar sounds inside words. Also creampies.

Usually I forget porn I watch moments after I watch it, unless it is very bad, very good, or very different. The “Crack Whore Confessions” series has stayed in my head for almost 24 hours. “Crack Whore Confessions 3″ features a porn performer the likes of whom I have never seen: a combination of Little [...]

A randomly-captured photo of Faith Leon from the movie Black Man’s Burden leaves me to wonder what she might have been thinking at that very moment. Here are some options off the top of my head: Is DirecTV really better than cable? Get out of your head, Meat That rug really tied the room together, [...]

As a licensed clinical massage therapist, or massagynist, I object to the portrayal of my craft in Hidden Camera Massage Scam as just a ploy to grope submissive Japanese women. In this seedy Tokyo reverse-rub-and-tug masquerading as an upscale spa, shady masseurs cajole doughy patients into having sex with them. But what I don’t understand [...]

There is a lot of self-righteous hand-wringing lately about depictions of the tender black/white relationships found in interracial porn and, while no one bats an eye that every non-matriculated New Sensations performer is pictured in the same plaid schoolgirl skirt (with tie), somehow they choose to believe that depictions of all black men as thugs [...]

Can you imagine? A train on which there is nothing but gangbangs? I hear from my Member of Congress that some of that SoCal-bound stimulus money is going to be diverted from trains that crash to trains that bang. Still, we need to think about the role of money in a classless society. Here, for [...]

Maybe she’s no Kate Winslet (in that she still gets naked), but Sadie West demonstrates tremendous powers of incarnation in the New Sensations movie The Voyeur in Me. “The actor’s craft requires – nay, demands – the seamless incorporation within the instrument points of view, ways of being, that are antithetical to the personhood of [...]

As you know, the Journal of Invented Statistics reported that 97.3 percent of DVD sales came as a result of boxcover photos alone. That is why each boxcover must pack in as much information as possible. Chatsworth Pictures’ I Can’t Believe You Sucked A Negro 3 tells us several things right off the gat, as [...]

I don’t want to seem prudish and don’t suggest that other people stop doing something that obviously gives them pleasure, but I find gaping distasteful. I don’t want to holler down your rainbarrel; I want to stop it up. And when the Porno-American Community bands together to present a clinical view of someone’s (thankfully) obstruction-free [...]