I might be going out on a limb here, but at no time does sex really need to happen in this movie.

Studio: Metro/Cal VistaDirector: DCypherCast: Riley Mason, Justine Joli, Leah Luv, Veronica Jett, Charlotte Stokely, Cassie Courtland, Barrett Blade, Eric Masterson Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot Rachel (Justine Joli) asks us to forgive another tale of post-adolescent angst as she narrates from her diary. Well, OK. As long as it’s you who’s asking… [...]

Assraelis is an added-value porn movie. In addition to being a travelogue for those of us who have not visited Israel it is also a marketing hook that includes angry outcries from clergy, just by virtue of the movie having been shot in Tel Aviv. I’ll try to keep the porn movie separate from the [...]

Studio: Digital PlaygroundDirector: Robby D.Cast: Jesse Jane, Alektra Blue, Daisy Marie, Isabella Dior Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot If life has taught us anything, it is that Jesse Jane, like a shaved, 3-in-1 ZZ Top, can appear to right wrongs and fight crimes. Such is her role in “Image”, a must-have for [...]

David Aaron Clark’s Dreaming of Snow, a two-disc compilation of scenes he shot here and there from as far back as 2002, is an excellent way of getting acclimated to his particular style, which seems to bridge the gap between 70′s movie theatre porn from New York and San Francisco and today’s by-the-numbers gonzo fare. [...]

I sat on this review for a while because this 2005 Swedish quasi-porn movie (where the lack of reality comes from the story rather than the sex) had yet to be released in the United States, though it is on Wicked’s slate for distribution this Spring. But All About Anna will be screened by the [...]

Studio: Innocent Pictures/Zentropa ProductionsDirector: Jessica NilssonCast: Gry Bay, Mark Stevens, Eileen Daly, Thomas Raft, Morten Shelbech, Thomas Lundy, Ovidie Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot The mainstream porn movie is an elusive thing, and usually happens by accident. Wild Things seems to have had the right sensibility, whereas both the heavy Eyes Wide [...]

While Sasha Grey and Naomi don’t compete in this two-disc set from Red Light District, our team of international judges awards the point regardless to Grey in Gang Bang Volume 5. Why? She wanted it more. Still – that Naomi? No slouch. Read the review here. Previously: In space, no one can hear you, Screech; [...]

Studio: Red Light DistrictDirector: John StrongCast: Sasha Gray, Naomi, everybody else Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot This two-disc movie, containing two individually-packaged DVDs of first Naomi, then Sasha Grey being gangbanged, really is of tremendous value to people who like to watch women getting gangbanged. It’s difficult sometimes to figure out what [...]

Studio: Pink VisualDirector: Jonas, RicoCast: Brooke, Brea, Ariel, Denise, Naomi, Hailey, Amy Ried, Ashley, Naomi Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot This movie opens cold. There is no jingle, credits sequence, or scrolling exposition about Emperor Palpatine. Instead we are suddenly following Hailey (we don’t even bother with a last name until Amy [...]

For a movie that had so much of an ancient language in it (in this case, Latin), I sure enjoyed Joe Gallant’s Avenue X more than The Passion of the Christ or Apocalypto. For bloodshot and grim women getting it on in warehouses, Brian Surewood returning to nature (though he didn’t have to go too [...]

The letter from Playboy’s Home Entertainment Division that accompanied my copy of the three-DVD set Playboy After Dark read: “Grammy! Here is your sophisticated entertainment. I hope the lack of cumshots isn’t disappointing.” Is that what you people think of me? I dimly remember repeats of Playboy After Dark, Hugh Hefner’s “rumpus room party” from [...]

Until now, I had never watched a celebrity sex tape. It’s weird, though, because Screeched requires that each word be put in quotations. Dustin Diamond is not really a “celebrity.” The “sex” is not very good (Red Light District cleverly hedges its bets by filling the bonus material with actual sex scenes with Annette Schwarz [...]

Studio: Red Light District Director: Dustin “Dirty Sanchez” Diamond Cast: Screech, with unrelated bonus scenes featuring Tia Tanaka, Rebecca Linares, and Annette Schwarz “Mmmm,” says Dustin Diamond, who played “Screech” on the 80′s Saturday morning kidcom “Saved by the Bell,””Cheese and cracker plate. I could eat that shit right up.” He has released a sex [...]

As you know, I save my Instant Messenger conversations. I was chatting with a female friend who works in adult marketing and asked her if a porn movie that has as one of its plot points the death of a child would need to work extra hard to turn her on. “Is that the movie [...]

“…this movie is a far cry from ‘Jamie’s Cryin,” but thoughtful couples may want to reach down between their legs and ease the seat back regardless.”

Listen: you think I like not liking things? At the end of -x- amount of minutes watching a porn movie, reviewing a product, or talking with some company’s new contract performer, don’t you think I want to have been pleased with the experience? Gram is all about Love. That’s why Girls Lie was such a [...]

“Girls Lie” was my favorite Eon McKai movie

Studio: SllabWurks Director: Frank Castle Cast: Linda Roberts, Mike Horner, Randy Spears, Nicki Hunter, Hailey Paige, Tyla Wynn, Barbara Summer, Brooke, Steven St. Croix, Jack Venice Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot There has not been a recent porn movie that so clearly makes its appeal to people over 40 as The New [...]

I was disturbed by the trend of intelligent people liking The Brown Bunny. I thought it should have been called The Brown Andrei Tarkovsky’s Stalker Kills a Chinese Bookie While Jerking Off in a Mirror with Drying Paint And a Blowjob at the End but She’s Dead: Big Fucking Deal Bunny.