Dear friends,
I have been traveling most of August but now I am back to service you. How has your summer been? You say you spent it chasing the dragon? Were you undercutting your partner and friend of several years selling DVDs out the back door? Did you remove the health insurance option for your employees and buy a Hummer?
Neither did I; we’re all very wholesome people.
During the brief time I dropped back in on Porn Valley I had occasion to see Mya Luanna, Memphis Monroe, and Shy Love taping a Hustler commercial on the set of Christmas in Memphis.
Q. Grams, how can America’s porn professionals manage to act as if it is snowing outside when snow is rare in the Valley and, what’s more, it is nowhere near Christmas and it’s hot outside?
A. That, my friend, is called acting. (Their orgasms are real, however.)
But you can see that the heat is even getting to our red-clad heroines, making the script seem like the formless ravings of a dildo company hack.
With temperatures in Porn Valley averaging 95 degrees in August (that day it was 102 degrees), it’s good that September is finally here.
Oh wait a minute. It’s going to be 101 today.
But what I’m saying is: free boobies.
you cxaught all 3 of them with their thinking caps on