Erotic, Cows

The Erotic/Exotic Expo and Ball returns to San Francisco’s Cow Palace this weekend, as will I.

The Ball was instituted in San Francisco in 1979, and a consumer expo component was added two years ago.

The Expo features erotic art, exotic fashion, sexy products and adult toys from hand-picked exhibitors, plus contests and prizes, a spiritual oasis, a free goodie bag, panel discussions, live burlesque performances from entertainers booked to perform for the Ball, and everything from staged Same Sex Weddings to a Human Petting Zoo.

Your guess is as good as mine as to what a spiritual oasis is. Those things don’t exist down here. Just the other day I was at a Jack in the Box drive-through.

“Would you like to try our Sourdough Jack Value Meal?” a voice asked.

“There is no God,” I said.

The Cow Palace is an historic edifice in San Francisco which was built to host livestock events and other ruminant-friendly affairs like the Grand National Rodeo.

It is fitting, then, that a leather event like the Erotic Exotic Expo will be held in a place that has such a fondnesss for pre-leather.

The Expo and Ball offers half-price admission to dwarves and midgets. I’m not kidding. Those of you who attend adult events know their attractiveness to little people.

In addition to performances by Thomas Dolby and George Clinton, the Expo and Ball will feature appearances by Tera Patrick, homewrecker Cytherea, Lynn LeMay, Sydnee Steele, Olivia O’Lovely, the congenial Sunny Lane, and Devinn Lane (no relation), who will host a MILF Makeover Contest (I’m assuming this means they take your children away).

The Exotic Erotic Expo takes place on Friday and Saturday, and the Ball will happen in the same location on Saturday night.

pictured: Tera Patrick’s appearance as the Rum-Tum-Tugger in Cats.

Previously: I like the way you stink; Erotic/Exotic redux
See also: Erotic Exotic Ball, Cow Palace

About Gram the Man 4399 Articles
Gram Ponante is America's Beloved Porn Journalist

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