Finish that sentence for a special adult product of my choice sent to your home, bunker, office, or Member of Congress.
You know how every few months I have contests, give away fabulous prizes, and then give up?
It’s because you people don’t respond.
I look at my site’s stats and see that I beat every adult news and commentary site that I don’t already write for, so I know you’re reading, buying movies, clicking through, etc.
Why don’t these devoted shadow readers submit answers for the chance at fabulous prizes? I thought.
Because they are more excited by the unknown, I sagely answered. And you give them too much power by telling them what they’ll win.
The operant word here is “submit.”
So I will choose your goddamn prize if yours is the best sentence completion in my opinion (Jesus – I sound like Lord Master Damian without the overcompensated low self esteem).
I took this picture of Holly Wellin four years ago today on the set of Acid Rain’s “Gag Me, Then Fuck Me 2.” I don’t think Acid Rain is even producing movies anymore. But you’re still here.
And, just so you know, I will not be sending the winner “Gag Me, Then Fuck Me 2.” You can buy that here if you so choose. But I have determined that you need to be told what to do.
(Bonus points if you can work in what she’s doing with her fingers.)