“Get My Belt”: There’s More Than One Way to Skin (Diamond) A Horse [review]

We get the feeling in “Get My Belt” that the character Ryan Madison is playing will come to a bad end. It’s inevitable. In the meantime, though, he lives life to the fullest.

getmybelt26Studio: Pornfidelity
Director: Ryan Madison
Starring: Ryan Madison, Chanel Preston, Brooklyn Lee, Chastity Lynn, Skin Diamond, a horse

A movie that is arty without being distractingly so, “Get My Belt” follows Madison (husband of Pornfdelity partner Kelly Madison) as a sort of hooting and bearded , violent and vulnerable lunatic. The sex in four vignettes is angry but not without its moments of tenderness.

The first segment, “Oh My God,” features Chanel Preston in a black-and-white, lens-flarey abandoned building where she is prone to rock back and forth, naked, in dry bathtubs. When she’s not in the bathtub, Preston is garbed in fetishwear and being mounted by Madison, who may or may not be a priest.

I was worried that this scene, somewhat overwrought and busy (these characters are pretty complicated; why can’t they just fuck?) might bode ill for the rest of the movie.

But it grew on me.


Still, to my mind, Preston is too beautiful for these symbolic accessories to be effective; I would have preferred her peeling off some overalls or a t-shirt, but eventually “Get My Belt” takes hold, and we watch Madison’s character mistreat a gutterwailing Brooklyn Lee (in color this time, and in and out of a vat of apples), and the eminently bruisable Chastity Lynn.

While Preston is a pole-dancing athlete whose body seems to tolerate torment, both Lee and Lynn are slighter, and their appeal in a BDSM movie like this one is that their writhing and wails are really credible. Madison is like a crazy Crispin Glover and Dave Matthews; he curls up on these women and often appears insane. It’s a sexual style we don’t usually see outside confessionals.


The last segment of the movie is the real production piece. Skin Diamond, as a slave, is led by rope through the desert scrub by Madison, who is mounted on a white horse. It is when he finally falls asleep after whipping and fucking her that the villain gets his comeuppance.

“Get My Belt” is impressive not only for its hard sex, committed performances, and cinematography, but also for its choices—Madison sticks with his character through four divergent scenes and does a few things that aren’t standard porn-dude fare. And the women take a real beating but their power is even greater.

For those left disturbed by “Get My Belt,” a bonus disc of Behind the Scenes footage reminds us that everyone is actually very friendly and considerate of each other.

I’m just sorry Kelly Madison was not in this. In our interview she said that there was no part for her. But she could have totally played the juicy saloonkeeper.

Kelly Madison, Ryan Madison, Skin Diamond, Chanel Preston, Chastity Lynn, Gram Ponante

Buy “Get My Belt” here

Previously on Porn Valley Observed: [Interview] Kelly And Ryan Madison—Sometimes A Spouse Needs A Good “Belt”
See also: Kelly Madison

About Gram the Man 4399 Articles
Gram Ponante is America's Beloved Porn Journalist

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  1. Porn Valley Observed: ‘Get My Belt’ Impressive for Sex, Performances, Choices
  2. review of Pornfidelity's Get My Belt (2013) | PVV

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