Any casual consumer of porn will recognize the hand of the mouth-breathing director of P.O.V. movies as it appears from the side of the frame to awkwardly grope some poor trapped thing.
Because I am a consummate professional, I did not touch Tanner Mayes but instead illustrated how tiny she is, as if she were Tokyo with nipples and I was Godzilla. My hand was actually across the room. And battleships were firing at me, etc.
My interview with Mayes will appear in Hustler’s upcoming All Sex issue.
Mayes said, “Aren’t they all All Sex issues?”
No. Hustler’s quarterly All Sex issues are different from other Hustlers because they won’t have articles about medical marijuana or exposes of Tea Party hypocrisy. If you were to find two Hustler magazines behind the Showcase Cinema in Lawrence, one an All Sex issue and the other a regular issue, the All Sex issue would be the one that is so well-used as to be totally unreadable, whereas you could get to the tattered pictorials in the other via the pristine Sebastian Junger articles.
I am very proud of this Hustler article, as it examines the Mayes Effect on older men (I am now 23). But what the article doesn’t mention is that Mayes owns a dog that looks like a koosh ball.
Previously on Porn Valley Observed: It’s not Mother’s Day for Belladonna’s dog; Someone’s in the shower with Stoya; Scarlett Fay’s extensions and, by extension, our own
See also: Hustler
Being 70 yrs old and having prostrate and bladder problems, the only thing that helps is watching Tanner Mayes perform.She has cured my erection problem!
THANK GOD FOR TANNER MAYES!
Dear Bob,
Thank you for your comments about Tanner Mayes. It is clear you and your prostate are huge fans (though I’m hoping your prostate isn’t huge on its own). How did you discover Tanner, in particular?