Kimberly Kane: Rainmaker

Sweetheart of Portland Kimberly Kane channeled a little bit of the Scottish moors when she shot a scene recently with the UK’s Harmony Films, making for a Southern California day that was tinged with mourning, regret, and the faraway bleating of sheep.

“Shoot it on her pussy hair, rub it up and down, then stick it in her ass,” director Gazzman said, sounding just like Robert Burns.

“You’re a dirtbag,” Kane said to her director, sounding like Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

Kimberly Kane is an excellent director in her own right. If you don’t believe me, watch her Live in My Secrets. But she was here as a hired holster on a beautiful Porn Valley day that, by virtue of her pale skin and newly (and originally) dark hair, made it seem like it was raining outside, waves were crashing against barren crags, and lighthouses were illuminating the way for Norman invaders.

“You need me to stretch my asshole a little?” she said.

Elsewhere on set, Tori Black was discussing lingerie with Gazzman, who has brought the tradition of eating biscuits on porn sets to America, rather than smoking meth.

“I find biscuits are an excellent afternoon snack,” he said, then put some underwear on his head.

Harmony has its own stores in England, where it distributes American porn titles throughout Europe. Here, Harmony has recently begun handling its own distribution after several years with Evil Angel. The company sends a small crew to the U.S. every six months to shoot the dirtier, more glamorous American talent.

“We’ll also be going to Australia for the Sexpo,” said Dave West, a Harmony director from Chicago. There they will shoot a couple of scenes with an Abby Winters girl gone good. And then the company will film scenes for another Porn Week, the event where fans get to interact with adult performers much less expensively than if they’d hired Anthony Pellicano to stalk them..

Back on set, Kane and DeSergio, who is British himself, are finishing up.

“Your dick is an enigma,” Kane says to DeSergio. But she doesn’t explain what she means, so it’s like an enigma wrapped in an enigma. I became profoundly uncomfortable, as my own laser-focused sense of journalistic procedure behooved me to ask her to clarify, and I just didn’t want to spend any time asking questions about penises.

Finally I thought of you, and did my job.

“Why is his penis an enigma?” I asked Kane.

“Have your parts ever been described enigmatically before?” I asked DeSergio.

“He was hard all the time he was fucking me,” Kane said, “then he popped, and now he’s still rock hard,” she said.

While appreciating that for the compliment I’m sure it was, both DeSergio and I realized he’d have to operate a motor vehicle soon, which would not be pleasant.

Kane stood by the window. She looked a little like Courtney Love playing Althea Flynt, without the Crazy. It was 80 degrees outside but she looked like she would be more at home, just as naked, in a house with rain falling on the roof. But it won’t rain in L.A. for the next 10 months.

But still…

“Don’t sit on the couch,” Kane said, pointing to where she and DeSergio had just performed marital acts. “It’s a little moist.”

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Previously on Porn Valley Observed: We Shall Overcome (on your face); Kimberly Kane is a handsome woman; Which is the greater obscenity – war or pornography?
See also: Harmony Films, Kimberly Kane

About Gram the Man 4399 Articles
Gram Ponante is America's Beloved Porn Journalist

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