Gram Ponante: America's Beloved Porn Journalist

MontagFoto 6.18.12—Vannah, show me Octomom

Did Lisa Ann know that she would become even more famous than her Web 1.0 peak when she embodied Sarah Palin for the first time in 2008? No. Nor could Vannah Sterling have imagined that the very person she portrayed in an Octomom parody would actually do porn.

Vannah Sterling as Coctomom

Here we are on the set of West Coast Productions’ “Brothel Life” back in March of 2009. This was two months after Nadya Suleman had gone from an unassuming mother of six to worldwide fame as Octomom but before anyone in the porn dream factory publicly thought of capitalizing on the phenomenon.

And little did Sterling—shown here as the “Madam” of a bordello also featuring Alexis Breeze, Elena Heiress, Angel Cummings, Jodi Breeze (no relation), Vanilla Red, and Jessica Bangkok (at least half of these women are no longer active in the adult industry)—know that she would soon rocket to stardom in the first Octomom porn parody.

Coctomom” was released in the summer of 2009 by Devil’s Film. It featured Sterling sharing the boxcover with a smiling sperm.

But just as the market declared VHS the winner over Beta and Blu-Ray superior to HD-DVD, so did the righteous and discerning public lose all interest in Octomom parody porn with the very real possibility that Ms. Suleman would do some actual porn herself, courted as she was by the gallant Vivid and later Wicked/Manwin.

I never saw “Coctomom,” but Sterling is a great performer who looks good doing porn. I imagine that, like a standup comedian dealing with a heckler, Sterling might have told Suleman: “Why do you show up to my job and knock the cocks out of my mouth? I don’t come to your house and stop you from having 14 kids via in vitro fertilization.”

Vannah Sterlin and Nadya Suleman

Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Octomom masturbates to the inevitable; Nailin’ Paylin for America; This Brothel Life

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Article by Gram the Man

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7 Comments Post a Comment
  1. Gram it might just be me but I find the smiling sperm disturbing.

  2. Gram the Man says:

    I have seen a lot of smiling sperm boxcover art over the years and, because of this comment, I will endeavor to make a small gallery of it. We have to face our fears, Fredrick.

  3. JR says:

    The smiling sperm reminds me of this story that’s not altogether apropos (but may be in the actual Octomom maternal situation, in a roundabout way): this older woman that looks like Dionne Warwick who’s on a local committee I’m on (long story, and yeah, holy fuck that sounds uncool) recently lost her father after a long time taking care of him. After we welcomed her back with our condolences, she said, “Thank you all. This whole situation makes you appreciate who your parents are, and how lucky it is we came to be with them. I mean, you could have ended up on a napkin somewhere…”

    Or an Octomom parody cover.

    Wise words.

  4. I must compliment you on the Lisa Ann montage. That alone is reason enough to come here. But as fears go I have a very short list and that creepy sperm is one of em. I place myself in your capable hands and await the art you bless us with!

  5. Gram the Man says:

    Thank you for this. And yet I wonder about this persistent belief that people use napkins or tissues to wipe something much more dense. Maybe it’s because she was grieving, but I would have preferred she’d said: “…on a warm, soapy facecloth somewhere.”

  6. Gram the Man says:

    “Montage” means so much more when Lisa Ann is concerned.

  7. Norm Copesurn says:

    She was doing duckface before millions of jailbait chicks on facebook made it cool. Fucking hipster.

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