Phoenix Marie doesn’t want the bouncers to kick you out. She doesn’t want you to spend your last dime. She doesn’t want you to feel awkward about your lack of deodorant.
In our conversation at the 2011 Adult Entertainment Expo, Marie explained that there’s just a few rules a fan must follow in order for him to receive all the benefits of the abundant but tightly-packed landscape of Phoenix Marie.
“You have to smell nice,” she says, “and let the girl do the touching.”
Also: Try not to cry.
If you follow these simple rules, Marie says, you make her job easier.
One reason I’m glad the world has Phoenix Marie is that she’s all about the casual customer service; she doesn’t up the wattage artificially, nor does she make you do all the work. She just wants you to calm down and let her grind her ass into your crotch.
I would totally become a regular at whatever bar Phoenix Marie buys after her porn career if only it wasn’t the kind of place where I’d get the shit kicked out of me.
Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Anatomy of an Oil Orgy; POTUS Interrruptus
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