Roman Polanski, the Oscar-winning director and international fugitive who was arrested on a 31-year-old U.S. warrant in Switzerland this weekend, has not responded to what Porn Valley insiders call a “generous” offer to reteam with Samantha Geimer for an update of their 1977 poolside tryst.
Polanski was 44 when he admitted to drugging and performing oral sex, intercourse, and sodomy on Geimer, then 13 and Polanski’s photographic subject for French Vogue, at the home of Jack Nicholson.
Geimer, now 44 herself, has forgiven Polanski, who fled the country when it appeared he would be jailed for engaging in unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor. He has since avoided countries with strong extradition treaties with the U.S., but was arrested Saturday while trying to enter Switzerland, where he was to accept a Lifetime Achievement Award at the Zurich Film Festival.
“We’re not sure if [the proposed Polanski/Geimer reunion video] would do Amy Fisher or Paris Hilton numbers,” said a spokesman for an interested studio, “but it would definitely beat the Buttafuoco numbers.”
“Since we’re classy,” a spokesperson for another studio said, “we will handle the negotiations with the same professionalism and tact for which we’ve become famous. Our pitch to Nadya Suleman was the quintessence of elegance, for example. We are experimenting with the titles ‘Vaginatown’ and ‘The 69th Gate.’ Get it? Because 69 is funny.”
It is unclear whether the 76-year-old Polanski, who directed “Rosemary’s Baby,” “Chinatown,” “Tess,” and won an Academy Award for “The Pianist,” would consent to acting in a porn film, even one with what industry insiders call a “huge budget.”
“This could really open up some doors for him,” said a noted director. “I could use him as Franz in my ‘This Ain’t The Unbearable Lightness of Being XXX.'”
Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Lou & Amy & Joe & Evanka: Coming to terms with your celebrity sex tape; Vivid offers contracts to journalists, athletes, relatives; Kylie Ireland is bad for glass
See also: Roman Polanski faces months behind bars as extradition battle unfolds
You know, for a hot second, I actually thought this was true, and the part of me that loves the porn died a little bit.
Love your site Gram but Polanksi won the Oscar for "The Pianist" not "The Piano," which was of course directed by Jane Campion.
Qu'ul cuda praedex nihil!
Pain
The Dis Brimstone-Daily Pitchfork
Polanksi??? Oh, dear. We're even.
hilarant!
Vous l'avez fait vous objet même, superordinateur très méchant!
Oh, what an idiot I am. Of course it's "The Pianist." (In the original post I wrote that Polanski won an Oscar for directing "The Piano.") I think, though, that if Harvey Keitel of "The Piano" had had Adrian Brody's role, "The Pianist" might have been just a bit more awesome…it would have been like "The Bad Lieutenant Goes to the Holocaust."
It's okay Gram as long as you promise to keep being the best porn writer in America I forgive you.
This whole Keithel thing has totally disrupted my entire group of cubicle dwellers. That's just plain old fucking brilliant! The Wolf in lieu of "the waif." Because isn't Harvey always the Wolf in one form or another?
And if I may be so bold a MILF has to be over the age of 35 IMHO and have had at least one child. Yeah I know but I'm picky about my porn rules!
I also think a MILF must actually have given birth to a child, but my age cutoff is changing.
"The Bad Lieutenant Goes to the Holocaust" has the be the bes thing I've heard all week.
oo my good estan buenisimos