Same time last year: Least Likely to be a MILF Edition

Maybe once every two months I will get a call or an e-mail from someone who has a problem with something I wrote. Either there is a factual error (I am Beloved, not Infallible) or, more often, the humor doesn’t jibe with the sensibilities of a person who might otherwise take money for producing/performing in movies with names like “Goo Goblins 12,” “Mr. Holland’s Anus,” or “My Mother the Negro-Banging Transsexual Asian.”

I don’t expect everything I write to be funny. In fact, I don’t expect that people who found me funny a week before when I was talking about someone else might find me funny when I talk about them.

This week a former (?) porn actress I like but who is a fibber (distinct from people I don’t like who are fibbers) called with a new and interesting account of what she’d been up to. One of the things she told me was that she was pregnant. I asked if I could print that, and she said Yes.

I also asked what the due date was. This is a standard question anyone asks an expecting mother, and one every expecting mother expects to hear. This alleged expecting mother, however, said, “Oh, I don’t know. March maybe?”

She told me a couple of other things, including the nationality of the person who did the deed, and I mentioned this in the story.

Well, I gleaned from the eight calls I received from this woman that, for some reason, my (what I think was complimentary) comment led to “my husband is screaming at me and threatening to divorce me.”

Anyway, despite the fact that I think this person is neither married nor pregnant, I took the story down. I do that maybe once a year.

This week’s flashbacks start with another tough luck story.

• Sometimes porn girls are like candles in the wind (January 19, 2005)
• I anticipate Not the Brady Bunch XXX (January 24, 2006)
• Tera’s open relationship swings shut (January 20, 2006)
• Remember Nikki Nine? Fired from Hustler because she was working for others when she was supposed to be exclusive. She was nice, though. (January 23, 2007)
• Hentai = acceptable rape (January 23, 2008)