"The Five" has ten boobs, but what does it mean?

I recently watched Adam & Eve’s “The Five” and, despite the numerology craze sweeping the adult industry in preparation for the End Times, was unable to decipher the movie from an eschatological perspective. Does “The Five” stand for Bree Olson’s available holes? There’s the three obvious ones, but there’s at least six more, and then…

Erotica L.A. 2009 is the new 2002

Erotica L.A. seemed packed the two days I attended, and that is an encouraging – though qualified – sign for Porn Valley’s most precious resource. The south hall of the L.A. Convention Center had been floorscaped to smaller dimensions than in previous years, so it was hard to move around. Crowds formed around Belladonna, consumers…

The Five

Studio: Adam & EveDirector: Andre MadnessCast: Bree Olson, Alexis Texas, Jenna Haze, Sasha Grey, Shyla Stylez, Johnny Sins, Mr. Pete, James Deen, Scott Nails, Danny Mountain Portions of this review also appeared on Fleshbot Just so you know, “The Five” is not about some elite crimefighting team, unless the crime is not having an opportunity…

Hustler avoids saying "Sector 69" in "Star Trek" parody

The genius that resulted in porn’s two finest ham actors, Nick Manning and Evan Stone, being cast as Khan and Kirk, respectively, in Hustler’s “This Ain’t Star Trek XXX: What Could Paramount Possibly Gain by Suing Us?” could have run out by the time writing the script came around, but No: As you see in…

Premium Cash: Gina Lynn just wants it more

One of the interesting ways porn companies make money is by licensing content to mega porn sites (all of which could do exponentially better by syndicating this website, because who looks at porn for the pictures?), thus Katsuni, Jenna Haze, Gina Lynn, and director Jules Jordan have signed on with affiliate program Premium Cash, which…

Amy Fisher: MILF over Miami

Exxotica Miami, which in the past three years has grown to be the East Coast’s biggest adult consumer show, next month features Amy Fisher hosting “The Search for South Florida’s Hottest MILF.” And the contest is on Mother’s Day, May 10. I know of no other way for Dade County’s moms to show their devotion…

Working on a sex pharm: The HMO-erotic Nurses

Two months after production of Pirates 2 wrapped last year, Digital Playground went north to Santa Clarita for five days in July to shoot Nurses, which follows Babysitters (and will probably precede Stewardesses, Policewomen, and, if I’m lucky, Nuns) in Digital Playground’s Potentially Sexy American Occupations series. Above, Katsuni and Shay Jordan deal with Tommy…

“Nurses”: When bedside manner is too far away

Studio: Digital Playground Director: Robby D. Cast: Jesse Jane, Stoya, Riley Steele, Katsuni, Sasha Grey, Gabriella Fox, Shay Jordan, Shyla Stylez, Jenna Haze, Shawna Lenee, Manuel Ferrara, Evan Stone, Scott Nails, Erik Everhard, Tony T., Mr. Pete, James Deen, Tommy Gunn, Danny Mountain, Johnny Sins What kind of hospital is this? A short time ago…

AVN 2009: The only numbers you can trust

Number of times it took Stormy Daniels, equipped with oversized ceremonial scissors, to cut the ribbon opening the 2009 AVN Adult Entertainment Expo: 4Amount of times Jesse Jane’s body would likely fit into that of her husband, if the latter were hollowed out: 4Number of minutes prior to the closing of the red carpet that…

A-List Features promises a porn star in every lap

You would not be surprised to learn that the Porn Valley performers who grace your hot wings-and-melon body spray-scented gentlemen’s clubs in Woonsocket, Bogue Chitto, and Big Piney are all booked via feature dancing agencies, and that strip club “featuring” is a great revenue stream for porn performers who don’t have to share that money…

Pirates 2 contest reaches wailing climax

I received several excellent ropey lyrical volleys for the Pirates 2 contest, leading me to think we should have a contest every month around here. The challenge was to write a poem inspired by Pirates 2, the same way Madonna wrote songs inspired by the film Dick Tracy. Yes, exactly like that. There were limericks…