Throughout recorded history I have tried to provide a clear accounting of what it is like to be on a porn set, and now I need go no further than pointing you to Topless Movie Reviews.com. It is like National Geographic but with less breastfeeding. It is like the conversation you have with your hot wife or girlfriend about what you need at IKEA.
Launched in March, TMR currently features the topless Sophie Dee, Tyler Faith, Natasha Nice, Melina Mason, Mylie Moore, and Emy Reyes delivering short reviews of Hollywood films. Hosted by the same company that houses Sophie Dee’s paysite as well as that of talent agency Valleybabes, TMR currently has a dozen reviews in different categories (including, oddly enough, Family, in which Dee and Faith critique the animated “Hop”).
While Reyes might giggle pornishly during her review of “Bridesmaids,” that is an exception. Aside from the tits in your face, there is nothing sexual about this site; the women happen to have their tops off as they relate the merits—or lack of them—of movies like “Scream 4.”
(“I didn’t jump once,” says Sophie Dee, her breasts remaining perfectly still.)
I can’t tell you how many perfectly pleasant conversations I have had with naked, lubed, shaved women on porn sets while we discussed cell phone coverage, postage rates, the best hamburger in Los Angeles, or alternate routes to the airport. Fucking the body in front of you into next Tuesday only occurs to you after you’ve looked at the pictures.
Topless Movie Reviews is not the first instance of women doing things topless that most people do clothed, but unlike a topless bar, for example, it’s difficult for me to understand why someone would go to TMR as opposed to a regular movie review site.
The answer may be obvious to fans of TMR’s main sponsor, Mr. Skin.
Mr. Skin is a site that tells consumers where and when nudity occurs in Hollywood movies, with less of an emphasis on the quality of the nudity than on the existence of nudity. So the fan who is just happy seeing pretty naked girls might not care about what they’re talking about, or even how they’re using their bodies, just as long as they’re naked.
Perhaps porn has desensitized me to the simple pleasures of watching a woman say something non-sexual while also undressed.
If you believe that sexless nudity is as much of a tease as fully-clothed sexiness, watch Dee’s review of “Sucker Punch”—Dee rated it a 4—alongside the actual movie, which has no nudity in it.
Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Filthy Gaelic with Sophie Dee; Origin Stories—Natasha Nice; Porn parody boldly tackles race, dairy
See also: Topless Movie Reviews
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