Bienvenido a Valle de Porn, Casey Parker

As the Mayor of Porn Valley (in that way I am like Vaclav Havel), I am often asked to ceremonially greet new arrivals.

Thus I brought Shane’s World contract performer Casey Parker to the Lamplighter restaurant at the corner of Nordhoff and De Soto in Chatsworth.

“AVN is right over there, Hustler has its studios down there, Adam & Eve just moved in over there, and I think XBiz just bought this Michoacan stand over here and the train tracks,” I pointed out. “Red Light is down the street, Pureplay is just a little bit farther, Jim Holliday died over there, Topco is right there, JM is right around the corner…”

Parker nodded solemnly.

“To what do you attribute this unprecedented access I have to your person?” I asked.

“Your good genes?” Parker did not reply.

Parker is currently attending a local college and is reading Gabriel Garcia Marquez’ “Macondo” in its original Colombian-flavored Spanish in her spare time.

“I get a lot of comments,” she said. “The other night I stopped by the gas station after the gym to get a pack of smokes – ”

“Those stunt your growth,” I noted.

” – and there was a group of guys going ‘Mira la guera’. I stopped and said, ‘Se lo que estas diciendo’ and then they looked all shy.”

Parker knows Spanish from surfing Central America, as there are few surfing spots in her native Colorado.

Parker’s first movie for Shane’s World, Casey Parker: The Girl Next Door, arrives this week.

Parker seems like a delghtful human being, and I took all the pictures I wanted. I’ll post a gallery later in the week.

Previously: Open bar at the Van Halen place; Shopping with Generation X, Y; Night of the Stars recognizes freedom, snacks
See also: Shane’s World