Memphis Monroe unpeeled for field manual

I have a feeling that the promotional Memphis Monroe video might be the best thing about the new book “Wife Training: A Pig’s Guide to Love And Marriage.”

The Pride of Northern Kentucky and Southern Indiana gives 90’s-era Jenny McCarthy a run for her money in her I Know You’re Looking at My Boobs But You Should Listen Anyway presentation. It was enough to get me to the book’s website, anyway, where I found some things that concerned me.

• As a happily married man, I know that wives chafe at the word “training.” Instead, they prefer subtle emotional reconditioning which may include unpredictable gifts of chocolates (to keep them on their best behavior) and mindful taps to certain fleshy areas.
• The book says that women prefer “real men.” I believe this, too, but everyone knows that real men don’t use .net extensions; they find an available .com and go for it.
• I don’t know why some chapters needed exclamation points and others didn’t. I was also disappointed in Chapter Six, “The Holy Grain of Wife Training.” Don’t you mean grail? I wouldn’t be up to my Xiphoid Process in primo female tail if I wasn’t conversant with King Arthur and Indiana Jones.

But lesser literary endeavors have always benefited from the presence of hot women. If you don’t believe me, look at this.

Monroe says she shot the video last year. “It’s hilarious LOL,” she explained.

Previously: Memphis Monroe’s nipples get Clubbed; “The Delivery Man”; bodies buried in the desert
See also: Memphis Monroe’s “Wife Training” ad; “Wife Training”