As America’s Beloved Porn Journalist (and now as a director of a hit porn parody), I get a great deal of unsolicited nudity in my inbox.
Most of this comes from savvy talent agencies alerting me to the arrival on Porn Valley’s shores of newly-minted talent, or talent that has switched agencies, names, hair colors, or breast sizes, or has recently gone from G/G to B/B/B/B/B/G, Interracial, Bukkake, Anal, Swallows, Fisting, Privates with the recent departure from the scene of a boyfriend/husband.
In these cases I am sure the women are over 18.
But recently I’ve been receiving some beautiful pictures of women who want to get into the adult industry, who read this and other porn websites, and who send me naked pictures with no proof that they are of a legal age to do so. If you fit that description, please understand that I can’t even write you back or acknowledge your photos without an ID, and that I rid my hard drive of your photos once you send them. It pains me to do this.
Anyway, here are my three favorite Inbox Nudes from the past week.
Layden Sin
Age: 18
Agency: OC Modeling
SEXY LAYDEN SIN IS NOW DOING GIRL/GIRL/ANAL!!! screams the subject heading. Since Ms. Sin only became legal recently, how quickly she allowed anal into the picture! Of course, it is only Girl/Girl/Anal which means (I think) that she could get a baseball bat up there provided it’s a girl who’s swinging it.
Ms. Sin is, of course, quite striking, but I believe she borrowed those shoes from a whore.
Maryjane Johnson
Age: 18
Agency: Metro Talent
It is a unique skill to look so wholesome even when you are showing me your colon on a hotel room bed.
Jessie Andrews
Age: 18
Agency: OC Modeling
Despite the fact that she was not alive in the 1980s (just turn that factoid around in your head a little bit), Ms. Andrews reminds me of the type of character a young E.G. Daily would play.
Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Savanna Samson 1988 Status Quo song, says 1982 Joe Jackson song; Gia Paloma’s fan letter
See also: OC Modeling, Metro Talent
“If you fit that description, please understand that I can’t even write you back or acknowledge your photos without an ID, and that I rid my hard drive of your photos once you send them. It pains me to do this.”
It pains me to hear you describe having to do this. Thanks for sharing the legal goodness, though, and here’s hoping we’ll be seeing a lot more of Ms. Maryjane Johnson really soon.
All I can say re: Maryjane Johnson is, “I KNOW, RIGHT?”
Yeah, I’m loving the look of Ms. Maryjane Johnson, and I HOPE HOPE HOPE no one talks her into getting a boob job.
As for Jessie Andrews, I’ve been following her on Tumblr for a month or so, and I’m loving many of her pictures – if she does get more fully-involved, I HOPE (x3) that she, too, stays unaltered.
I still believe in a place called Hope.
Last night, I discovered JUST how “involved” Ms Andrews is. Yow. 😉