As I travel the highways and byways of the land in my recreational vehicle, one thing I don’t discuss with other patrons of trucker bars, detention camps, and yoga retreats is whether or not the guys wear condoms. I don’t discuss it because I already know the answer (that is why I will never be a lawyer): men hate wearing condoms.
Lifestyles condoms seem to be the ones most often passed out for free, and I have never worn one that hasn’t broken. At one point I concluded that Lifestyles must be a front for the conservative Heritage Foundation. I switched to a type of Trojan because they seemed as American as Zippo lighters and Coca Cola. But just because they fit and didn’t break didn’t make it any more pleasant.
But when I was Wicked and Vivid’s highest paid contract star* I needed to comply with their condom-only standard. That is why, when I visited Wicked’s Reflexions set the other day, I was surprised to hear Tyler Knight praising Durex condoms in his pairing with the tasty Delilah Strong.
“I can really feel her (through it),” he said.
For someone who feels wearing condoms is as distasteful as getting dressed up for church, I found this to be a ringing endorsement.
“You should do a commercial for Durex,” I suggested.
“Do you know me?” Knight began his pitch. “I am the the pornographic actor Tyler Knight…”
Reflexions stars Wicked contract star Julia Ann, but I was not able to stay for her appearance. I get the feeling that the Delilah Strong/Tyler Knight pairing, taking place as it did in a room filled with smoke, might have been somewhat outside of the story arc, which is described thusly:
In this stylistic yet edgy vignette, Julia Ann is an object of desire in which her reflection depicts her true sexual being.
…like a breastacular Portrait of Dorian Gray. I don’t know why a movie’s “stylistic” nature might prevent it from also being “edgy”, or why stylistic was used instead of stylish, but that is why I don’t write press releases.
What I learned is that Delilah Strong emerges from the mist like a leggy Isle of Avalon and that some condoms can be comfortable. I don’t know how I might apply that knowledge in my life, but it’s still good to know.
See the gallery here.
Previously: Dreaming of Snow; East Side Story gets its priorities in order; Whither Shane’s World?
See also: Wicked, Durex
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