How to become famous in porn

My friends at the Typecasting commercial casting agency (forever, now, to be linked with a porn site) called looking for porn stars for a new commercial/experimental film by a major sports and fitness company.

Seeking:
Women in all levels of the adult entertainment industry. 18-30 to appear in an experimental film produced by a major company, directed by an award winning European directing team. This film may be later edited into a commercial with residuals.
The rate is $400.00 per day plus a $500.00 buyout upon use.

Please call the Typecasting office at 310 775 6616.
Auditions are Friday and Monday.

As your protector, I pointed out that porn ladies usually make two-to-three times more a day than that, and mentioned that enough of you know exactly what is meant by “experimental film” in other contexts (i.e. “I noticed about halfway through the blowjob that the camera light wasn’t even on”), but this is, in fact, a legitimate enterprise.

“What kind of porn stars?” I asked. “Juicy fetish models? Rail-thin spinners? Latinas? Asians? Black women? Meth-y wraiths? Glamazons? Girls next door? MILFs? GILFs? One could technically be a grandmother at 30.”

“Er, any kind,” they said. “All types.”

“Will there be nudity?” I probed.

“No,” they said. “Probably bikinis.”

“All right,” I said. “Don’t break their hearts.”

You can also e-mail James at Typecasting here.