Now that Kurt Lockwood has made me an international superstar and industry icon my celebrity gigs are rolling in. I will be hosting the pot belly pig races at the Smith family picnic this weekend, but more importantly I will be a Guest Judge on the MySpace of the Famous Goze.
He has Rant tournaments to rival anything any tweeked out porn personality can come up with. Plus he Looks a lot like David Hasselhoff when I have been drinking.
And let’s be honest folks, when have I not been drinking!
Add the brother if you are on MySpace and get ready to read some of the funniest shit ever!
His MySpace also features an advice column with such gems as this:
Dear Relationship Guy-
My boyfriend doesn’t seem to listen to me anymore. He use to be so attentive when we first met, but now I don’t think he listens to a word I say. The only time we seem totally is during a commercial break or a time out. I just don’t think were communicating anymore. Please advise!
-Speechless in Stockbridge
Dear Speechless in Stockbridge-
Unfortunately you are communicating, but you aren’t communicating effectively. Take Apollo Creed and Rocky Balboa for example. What was Apollo thinking when he told Rocky he wanted a rematch at the beginning of Rocky II, when we all clearly heard him say twice at the end of the first Rocky movie, There ain’t gonna be no rematch. There ain’t gonna be no rematch. With the exception of the double negatives, I actually had to agree with him. I mean he pretty much got his ass kicked. Boy did he look dumb at the end of Rocky II when he lost his world title. Its a good thing Apollo didn’t try to get into the ring against Clubber Lang (Mr. T) in Rocky III. I mean, I wouldn’t want to get into the ring with Mr. T. I pity any fool that would!
He is no Ask Kami But he’s as funny as a fat kid chasing the short bus after he overslept!
Enjoy the funny (and my boobs)!
The Tourney starts Thursday but try to get in good with Goze, I do fuck all finalists.
Right ill not lie i am interested in you… lol dramatic start if not predictable…firstly i would liketo clarify i wont show you my penis… lol.. but your blog seems to be so interesting.. you are really inteeligent and have interesting topics..so… couldnt help but give a shot and say fancy a chat ll i suppose you dont get many facny a chats maybe something else but anyhow ill give it a shot and ask that :0 im addy is a.kula@btopenworld.com regarless havea a nice day Kami