Glenn Beck: What’s wrong with America

I was able to withstand about 12 minutes of CNN’s “Porn: America’s Addiction” expose featuring Glenn Beck (three minutes fewer than Dirtpipe Milkshakes 2).

Beck is part of CNN’s attempt to compete with Fox News by adding “personality” to their lineup by any means necessary. A conservative and recovering alcoholic, Beck has no qualms about admitting to/boasting of both, and people watching his broadcast need to understand that even he would admit to the theatrical aspect of his commentary, a la Phil Donahue’s criticism of Bill O’ Reilly or Jon Stewart’s tussle with Tucker Carlson.

But Beck’s stammering outrage as he presented old news factoids one after the other wasn’t even entertaining. There are plenty of people who don’t like porn who have interesting things to say about it. Beck’s commentary was petty and belligerent, like a yappy dog behind a locked door.

AVN president Paul Fishbein was interviewed remotely. “I was on a screen and (Beck) could see me but I couldn’t see him,” Fishbein said. The effect was that Fishbein appeared disoriented blinking into the camera at an oblique angle to the audience.

BECK: Now, Paul Fishbein, he is the president of “Adult Video News”. What is that, like the porn “Variety” magazine?

FISHBEIN: Yes, exactly. The trade publication for the adult entertainment industry.

BECK: How proud you and your family must be.

Beck paired his swooning indignance that porn not only existed but also made money with smirky dismissals like this one.

It is not hard to make the porn industry look silly – just read its press releases – but that Beck resorted to this kind of bashing from a safe distance made him look absurd and people like Fishbein look considerate and urbane.

Beck tried to get Fishbein to slip up in a discussion of where the money goes, then used language like “you people” as if CNN’s parent companies didn’t have anything to do with porn, from hotel softcore to infotrash like TMZ.com. Finally Beck resorted to

BECK: Do you have children?

FISHBEIN: Yes, I do.

BECK: Male or female?

FISHBEIN: I have a young daughter.

BECK: You have a young daughter.

FISHBEIN: I have — I have…

BECK: How proud she will be. Are you going to share this business with her?

FISHBEIN: You know what? She — while she is a child, no, I will not. And when she`s an adult, over the age of 18, she will be well educated, well brought up…

BECK: That`s right.

FISHBEIN: She will be able to make her own decisions.

BECK: That`s great. Bringing the family together.

I taped this program when a friend called and said, “There’s another blowhard on TV talking about porn” and I thought that (bless his heart) Bill Margold had collared someone again. What I found was a sweeps month rehash that presented titillation as news with people acting all het up about something that they were very attracted to.

To Beck’s credit (I guess), he talked about porn as his own temptation. It seems that if he is unable to manage his own temptations, whether they be alcohol or money or porn, the solution would be to get treatment rather than bluster at people. It was hard to tell if he was legitimately offended or if he felt that acting hysterical would get ratings. Probably a combination.

Watching this excerpt made me sad. Not for Fishbein or for the adult industry (though a little for CNN), but for anyone who might have watched it while nodding “Yes, yes” who saw in Beck’s approach a validation of their own lurking in chat rooms, cross burning, or anonymous letters to the editor.

Here is the transcript of the show, which featured all of two porn companies (Vivid and Danni’s Hard Drive).

To e-mail Glenn Beck, click here.