Dear Readers: Not since Transsexual Jerk-offs has there been a porn title that could double as something we might have called each other, devoid of any sexual connotation, in eighth grade.
“What’s that transsexual jerk-off doing in my locker?”
“Chubby twat’s stealing your Megatron poster, dude.”
See? Confusing.
Anyway, I was interested to see if this film featured twats that were themselves chubby (which the title implies), or if the chubby women were all twatty. Lucky for you, they are not. They’re just hard-working gals trying to catch a break in an unfair world.
Like unappreciated housemaid Devyn Devine.
Or Sunshine, who made me think of this story. While Sunshine does not seem to be a twat, her attitude about her tremendulous breasts is very casual. I have a feeling that she has ceased to walk anywhere in her neighborhood because she feels bad about the traffic accidents that follow in her path.
Roxie’s scene with her therapist is poignant. She is complaining about her husband’s negligence.
“What do you think?” she asks in a thick Chicago accent. “Do you think my boobs are too big?”
This is a pretty funny scene. Her uncredited scene partner is an effective straight man, as one must be in the face of such boobs. When the scene takes it inevitable turn toward boundary-crossing behavior, we see why Roxie’s husband stopped touching her.
“What are you doing?” she brays at her therapist, who is just trrying to help. “Get it in there.”
The scene is also a study in the Chicagoland dialect. Everyone sounds like a cross between Alix Lakehurst and Elwood Blues.
“Put yer caack in me,” Roxie says.
“It is our first date,” says Ava at the end of the night. “Maybe we should slow things down.”
Immediately after, she changes tacks.
“Maybe we should kick it up a notch.”
(You know, it is these mixed messages, combined with her revealing outfit, well, you get the picture. I’m just saying. No jury in America. Any man alive. Asking for it, etc.)
If you are looking for these women now (as I would be), you might be out of luck, as the movie was produced in 2006 our of photoshoots for magazines like “Buxotica.” Why I just got sent this film now is the real crime.
This movie is actually called XXX Chubby Twats, but I think that the “XXX” isn’t necessary when the “Twats” is present, just like the motto of Wellesley College.
XXX Chubby Twats
Previously: Say hello to my big friends
See also: Score Group
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