Nikki Benz to reward simulated fellatio, as if that’s good

The Screaming O, a collection of marital aids marketed out of the adult playground of Torrance, CA, will be presenting its third annual Go Down Ho Down Throwdown at this week’s Adult Entertainment Expo, hosted by Nikki Benz.

“You think you’re good?” taunted Benz. “Then suck it up and bring it to the main stage, bitches.”

Apparently the contest will pit amateurs and pornstars against one another to see who can achieve the best orgasm or perform the best blowjob, and the fans will judge.

The ruckus is to be brought on January 9 at 4:15 at AEE’s main stage.

A grand prize of $1,000 dollars cash will be awarded to the winner, but most importantly, bragging rights will be on the line.

Yes, bragging rights. Readers, let me ask you something: What type of woman is it who brags about giving the best blowjobs? I am thinking about five women who have said that to me in particular and to this day I have not received a blowjob from any of them.

One more thing: as nudity is not allowed in the Sands Convention Center, I can’t imagine that these blowjobs will be perpetrated on human subjects. Most likely there will be cucumbers used in such a way as to set school lunch programs back several years.

Regardless, it’s all in good fun and it’s for a good cause: the continued success of the City of Torrance, CA.

Previously on Porn Valley Observed: Prod of the O.C. – Extreme Restraints
See also: The Screaming O, City of Torrance

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Gram Ponante is America's Beloved Porn Journalist

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