Surviving 70’s Porn Tropes And What We Can Learn from Them
Is the 70’s porn creepiness gene necessary for our survival?
geekery
Justine Joli: Nerd
On the wonderful Justine Joli’s birthday, we revisit an interview FROM THE SECOND BUSH ADMINISTRATION.
A Sex Poem for the Chosen
Sundown, you better take care/If I see you been shavin’ off your pubic hair
Ponante Tapped To Lens Scientology Porn Epic
“We need to cast the perfect Xenude,” says Engram Ponante
Slave Leia And Pale Tit Skin: Transitional Times for She Geeks
“When I’m Lily Potter, they say things like, ‘I like the way your hair reflects on your pale tit skin.'”
OUTRAGE: The French And Their Horrible Tradition of Foot Shaming
“Le Monde is — how you say — not so big, eh?” — Francois de Mechagodzilla Petite-Squirrele
The Ross Sisters, Pictures of Lily, Tom Hagen’s Trip, Calling Your Daughters like They’re Pigs, And Having A Crush on People Who Are Probably Dead
Minderjährigabertotenjetzlust doesn’t even cover it
Shutdown Shutters Government Fellatio Dog Program
In addition to closing National Park Service sites and furloughing federal employees, the government shutdown that went into effect this morning has closed the Fellatio Dog Program, which congressional Republicans call “the Blowjob Entitlement.”
Diamond Kitty Meets Boo Radley in “To Kill A Mockingbird XXX”
Porn Valley is buzzing about its latest job-creating, money-making, creatively worthwhile, and altogether useful parody “To Kill A Mockingbird XXX,” starring Rob Black as Atticus, […]
Her Name Is Jaslene, And I Am Poor Old Johnny Ray
Perhaps Dexy’s Midnight Runners will be comforted that someone thought of them IMMEDIATELY upon watching a popshot descend on the bejeweled stomach of Jaslene Jade. Probably not.
An Important and Culturally Significant Gallery of Mannequins from the Sex Toy Show
Gram Ponante goes in search of a mannequin without a dildo
Photoplay: What they’re thinking over in couples’ porn
“I don’t watch much couples’ porn, and have not seen a Penthouse movie in a while,” I said to myself, “so why not broaden my goddamn horizons?”
Skin Diamond nurses a lurking fear
The Skin [Diamond] was thickly covered with coarse black fur, and from the abdomen a score of long greenish-grey tentacles with red sucking mouths protruded limply.
A Haunting in Pornecticut or: Pornynormal Activity
In the movie “Pure MILF 2,” Lisa Ann cuddles up to some dude on his easy chair when a spirit wearing track pants is clearly seen walking by at the top of the stairs.
Adult Industry Moves to Maine Instead
“Some of these apple-picking girls fuck like the Wendigo is after them,” says Allie Haze. “They’re not scared of death.”
MontagFoto 3.18.12—When Assnet became self-aware
It was May, 2006, a year after I’d started Porn Valley Observedin earnest, when I attended my first “Pussy Party,” and it became one of those rare events in which I knew I was having a good time while I was having it.
Opening Up the Pod Bay Doors with Sinn Sage
People talk behind Sinn Sage’s back a lot, and it’s all nice things. It might have something to do with the quality of her back.
Historians weigh in on “True History of She-Male Cock”
“It stands to reason that if there is a movie called ‘The True History of She-Male Cock’ that there have been false histories,” says historian Doris Kearns Goodwin
Rocco Siffredi will squeeze your breasts painfully if you don’t wear a hat
“It says that the only way to keep Interstellar Beings from entering our skulls is to wear hats if you are female or sunglasses if you are male,” Siffredi said. “And you see, I have already purchased sunglasses.”
Blowjobs: Thing with Balloons Confuses, Momentarily Engages AEE Attendees [video]
Gram Ponante explains the balloon fetish like you’re some kind of idiot