The Golden Globes and Oscars of Porn agree on six films.
Gram’s Dirty Dozen of 2013 (powered by Gamelink)
Bonnie Rotten plays a sex-and-apocalypse-wizened bounty hunter in the movie Tommy Pistol was born to make.
Maddy Chandler has a “Winter’s Bone” thing going on, which is very appealing, but I don’t think she done been a’matriculatin’ nowheres.
In “Barely Legal 133,” the lush yet petite Tawny Tyler sullenly polishes a caulking gun amongst the paint cans. That’s right: She does.
“Gee. That Sara Sloane sure reminds us of Sarah Vandella.”
“You ain’t seen nothing yet,” sang BTO, and they were right.
Perhaps the biggest surprise of this movie—other than the fact that the tits dry off so fast—is that there weren’t more movies called “Wet Tits.”
You know how there’s no atheists in foxholes? That has nothing to do with barrio bitches and their buttholes.
“I’ve been so selfish with my gift!” says Anthony Rosano, agreeing to fuck Lexi Belle for free.
It’s movies like the sweet and ridiculous “Wet Dream on Elm Street” that makes us fall in love with easy, naked women with big boobs all over again.
I feel like every 18-year-old pornstress cast in a parody of some 80’s sitcom she’s never seen. No, not my champagne glass doughball breasts and my vagina that smells like watermelon bubblegum: a blank slate.
“These rings mean that, when I say sorry, I can put my wang back in your beav,” says Peter to Lois, and it’s true.
I may be wrong, but I think women like Angelina Jolie much more than men do; she is devastatingly attractive in that way women like but that men quickly tire of, since there’s no payoff. With Chanel Preston, there is only payoff.
On that day in 2008, she was the most beautiful woman in porn
I mean, do I have to think of everything? Anyway, this is the sort of e-mail I get. The following is a press release reprinted without edits to enlighten non-adult industry readers about how the porn business talks about itself. It was written by an adult industry marketing professional. Spontaneous Orgy Breaks Out on Set…
“…so many people (who don’t write porn) talk about how easy it is to write a porn script…”
Any poor shmoe can tell you that there is nothing more lonely than being loved “like a friend.” Follow hapless Anthony Rosano as he tries to break free of “The Friend Zone” in this excellent couples’ film from New Sensations.
“But we so wanted to see Tara Lynn Foxx as Jenny in the ‘Singled Out’ parody,” a spokesperson for the McCarthy family did not say.
Chanel Preston fulfills the promise made by Olivia Hussey (and ignored by Clare Danes) in Lee Roy Myers’ couples’-friendly “Romeo & Juliet.” Studio: DreamZone Director: Lee Roy Myers Starring: Rocco Reed, Chanel Preston, Andy San Dimas, Anthony Rosano, Ann Marie Rios, Brian Street Team, India Summer, Tom Byron You can rest assured that Lee Roy…