The Porner’s Almanac Comes Back from the Dead

...with Alyssa Branch as Lazarus

…with Alyssa Branch as Lazarus


It has been a great few months at Gamelink, but you may have noticed that I have neglected this place, this place where we first met, Porn Valley Observed. I’m sorry. It’s a lot of work up there in San Francisco, but I am thinking of ways to leverage the mighty archive of this site to the benefit of the flesgling blog Naked Truth, wherein I lead a small band of talented porn writers.

To this end I’ve reanimated the old Porner’s Almanac and, using a technical wizardry that is almost Asian in its scope, I can post something here and, if you want to know more about the people I’m talking about, you can buy their movies via something called “hyperlinks” — you just “click” on their “names” and … well, it hurts my brain to even think about.

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Whatever happened to Alix Lakehurst and Vixen Vogel? Gram was fond of the two pornstresses, one who left the business after her mission was completed and the other who disappeared in a cloud of mystery. He hopes they’re both OK, and acknowledges that internet trolls have both the motivation and the free time to find out. But Gram is content nursing a vague longing and whimsy (which is less obvious than an erection, and he’ll get someone else to nurse that, thank you).

In addition to unearthing a deliciously frank video from a Japanese hotel featuring Lakehurst, Gram talks with Teagan Presley and Alexis Texas about the latter’s fierceness.

Alexis Texas and Teagan Presley Porner's Almanac

Gram laments having lost a video in which Alexis talks about teabagging Teagan with her ass. Similarly, he is sad that he can’t say Happy Birthday to Lakehurst in person (wherever she is).

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Over a series of photos of newly-22-year-old Alyssa Branch

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…Gram says Happy Birthday to Lakehurst, Teri Weigel, Sean Michaels, Steven St. Croix, Julie Simone, the great Dirty Harry, Branch, Sunset Thomas, Jenna Haze, and Penny Flame.

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