Perhaps people need an obstacle to keep them focused, because it’s amazing how eloquent some women can get with a cock in their mouths.

Every day I spend as America’s Beloved Porn Journalist is not all about irrumatio, nailed deadlines, and speedballs. There are some days that I must go home emptyhanded.

I give the porn industry maybe three more weeks until it becomes completely mainstream. That is why I am pursuing basic cable deals, because that’s where the real money is.

“That’s so weird – and comforting,” I said to myself upon viewing the mustard-yellow vinyl sofa. “I also lay other things – like exotic wipes – in addition to pube-y Japanese women on my couch.”

When watching a Score movie I always feel like I’m viewing the sentient seas of the planet Solaris; eventually all that flesh takes on an identity of its own and I can no longer discern where one fold ends and another begins.

These two transfolk are demonstrating their version of the In-n-out on Camrose. The only way to make this trans-version of “The Big Lebowski” complete would be to have strapped on a severed toe.

How I wish you were here. We’re just one black pole squeezing in a tight hole year after year.

Will fans, performers, and exhibitors who haven’t been going to Erotica L.A. show up in Vegas for the XFanz Expo instead?

Because I had forgotten about gay icon Alan Ball’s bayou vampire saga “Tru Blood,” I naturally assumed New Sensations’ porn parody “Tru” was about Robert Morse’s bravura performance as gay icon Truman Capote.

Your nasal passages will be legendary, Akima Nakamori, even in Hell. But let’s save next year for Jerusalem.

This photo suggests that Tanner’s nipples come right off. But they don’t. It doesn’t mean one should ever quit trying.

If Hollywood can cash in on the small-breast niche, might porn benefit from Scientology?

Tanner Mayes is the reason a lot of us came to California in the first place.

“I’ll let you touch my ass,” she might say, “but don’t put anything in there.” “Sure, sure,” you’d say. Later, she might say, “I see that you are fucking me in the ass.

“With this you can stimulate the urethra, hook your thumb over to the G-Spot, get the A-Spot with this finger, and with the other hand stimulate the clitoris.”

“Thin Line Between Art And Sex” is really good-natured, which always makes people look sexy.

“If my tits are what get me in the door, then good for me. Because once I get in the door, they see that I am a good actress and that I take my work seriously.”

If you were Delbert Grady, wouldn’t you like to correct Alix Lakehurst? And what is it about hotel hallways that makes women so vulnerable?

Jameson denies rumors that she will be the Yo Gabba Gabba troupe’s sixth member, Teetoe

Nina Hartley, meanwhile, gave a very-present Evan Stone his Best Actor trophy, and they groped each other for a good minute while I stood by, alone, waiting for my chance to do things to Kane that would make the Kama Sutra curl up and explode.